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SELFIE

I’M NOT ADDICTED TO CIGARETTES
I’M NOT OBSESSED WITH FOOD.
I DON’T PLAY TOO MUCH CANDY CRUSH.
I FIND IT KINDA RUDE.
 
I CAN EX OUT MY NETFLIX ACCOUNT
WHEN I FINISH WHAT I’M VIEWING.
IF I GAMBLE OR SHOP, WHEN I WANT TO I STOP
THERE’S JUST ONE THING I CAN’T KEEP MYSELF FROM DOING…
 
I CAN’T HELP MY SELFIE
NO MATTER WHAT I TRY
IF I DON’T KNOW YOU LIKE ME
I MIGHT AS WELL POWER DOWN AND THEN DIE.
I NEED YOU TO BELIEVE THAT
NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO,
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE
I’M HAVING MORE FUN THAN YOU
 
IT’S NOT A QUALITY I ADMIRE,
I’M WILLING TO ADMIT
WHEN IT COMES TO MY DAY TO DAY
I OVERSHARE A BIT.
 
IF IT’S A "SWIPE RIGHT" KIND OF A NIGHT
THEN I NEED FOR YOU TO VIEW IT
I’M PRESENTING THE ME I THINK YOU THINK I SHOULD BE
I DON’T EVEN REALLY WANT TO DO IT, BUT
 
I CAN’T HELP MY SELFIE
THE MOMENT’S NOT ENOUGH
IF NOBODY IS JEALOUS
THEN WHAT IS THE POINT OF DOING FUN STUFF?
MY SELF-ESTEEM’S DEFINED BY
CONVINCING YOU IT’S TRUE, THAT
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE
I’M HAVING MORE FUN THAN YOU
 
SO CLICK, CROP, FLIP, SWAP
PHOTOSHOP SOME FRIENDS IN
ROTATE, SATURATE
MAKE SURE THE BACKGROUND BLENDS IN
 
FILTER IT THEN POST AND WAIT
PRAY THAT PEOPLE VALIDATE
MY EXISTENCE!
 
                  If it doesn’t get like fifty likes, this cocktail never happened!
 
I CAN’T HELP MY SELFIE
MY SOCIAL LIFE DEPENDS
ON SPREADING THE ILLUSION
THAT I’VE GOT LOT OF ACTUAL FRIENDS
WHO CARE WHEN I GO SHOPPING
OR COOK OR TAKE A POO
AND SOMEWHERE OUT THERE
I'M HAVING MORE FUN THAN YOU.

LA LA LA LA LA LA 
PLEASE BE MY FRIEND
LA LA LA LA LA LA
OH GOD. I’M SO LONELY.
LA LA LA LA LA LA LA
FOR SERIOUS. 
LA LA LA LA LA LA LA
THESE PICTURES ARE A CRY FOR HELP!
LA LA LA LA
I'M HAVING MORE FUN THAN YOU!



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